Adults with ADHD are less likely to graduate from college and even less likely to obtain advanced educational degrees. Like most adults with ADHD, these parents face uncertain career prospects. Although they may be intelligent and enthusiastic workers, they often have difficulties keeping a job. (Pary) Social skills deficits are common among this population. ADHD can interfere with the ability to establish and maintain close relationships and may contribute to an unstable home environment.

Parents of a child who has ADHD are three times as likely to separate or divorce as parents of non-ADHD children. (Barkley 1995) Simply place, the parent may not have the emotional tools needed to effectively support the special needs of the ADHD child. Parents who do not have ADHD report that these children are often far more challenging to parent than their non-ADHD siblings. The adult with ADHD faces the already formidable task of raising a hard child while at the same time trying to cope as best they can with their own ADHD. If the parents’ own ADHD issues are not addressed, these adults can have tremendous difficulties fulfilling their roles as parents.

Evaluating the Parent

Parents may be unaware that they exhibit behaviors that would indicate the presence of ADHD. Furthermore, ADHD has been long considered a childhood disorder. It was not until the mid-1980′s that researchers started to acknowledge that ADHD indeed lasted into adulthood. Parents may be under that mistaken belief that they outgrew their ADHD while in fact it continues to affect their life.

When treating a child who has ADHD, the physician should discuss with the parent the genetics of ADHD and inquire if a parent might be struggling with symptoms too. Physicians (i.e. pediatricians) who are uncomfortable or unable to evaluate the adult should then refer parents to another health care provider for an ADHD evaluation. Should the parent show resistance to the thought, the physician might discuss the difficulties of raising an ADHD child if ones own ADHD is not addressed and treated. One or both of the parents may indicate that they faced many of the same problems when they were a child. The parent may recall that school was hard, although he or she had the intellectual capabilities to do well. There may be family tales of hyperactivity or behavioral problems during the parent’s childhood.

Mothers or fathers may see in the opposite sex parent many of the same behaviors now being exhibited by their child. Often is the case when one parent will turn to the other and say, “I know where it comes from. You’re the exact same way!” Physicians may want to question about the behaviors of other family members as well, to better ascertain the possibility of undiagnosed ADHD in the family. These kinds of questions can bring up a plethora of information pointing to the possibility that the parent, too, might have the disorder.

Research on ADHD and behavioral disorders is honestly recent and may not have been attributed to ADHD when the parent was a child. The astute physician will take a patient history by posing questions in terms of behavior and not necessarily in terms of any specific diagnosis. How does this affect the physician’s role in evaluating and treating their young patients? Treating the parent is an vital part of improving the quality of life for the child. One can see that an impulsive, distracted parent might have problems remembering to give a youngster his/her medication. Adults with ADHD tend to be disorganized and often have difficulty maintaining a home. These adults have distress keeping appointments, getting the child ready and off to school in time, and performing other basic parenting duties.

How ADHD Symptoms Compare in Adults and Children

The same symptoms that apply to children with ADHD also apply to adults; but, the symptoms may be manifested in a number of ways. Diagnosis is further complicated by the overlap between the symptoms of adult ADHD and the symptoms of other common psychiatric conditions such as depression and substance abuse. (Searight)

The primary symptoms of ADHD are inattention, impulsivity and hyperactivity. The adult versions of these symptoms often have severe consequences. Inattentive children are reprimanded for daydreaming in class. Inattentive adults neglect their spouses, forget directions, and crash their automobiles. Impulsive children often make terrible choices. Impulsive parents also make terrible decisions.

Consequently, they may face huge credit card bills, marital strain and other negative consequences. Hyperactive children are always moving. Hyperactive adults may feel restless and are drawn to high-risk behaviors. Other behaviors that are common to children who have ADHD are also seen in adults with the disorder. Children with ADHD will procrastinate, turning in homework late, if at all. Their work is often sloppy.

Procrastination in adults results in paperwork and work-related projects being completed late or not at all. Bills go unpaid not because there is no money, but because the adult simply never gets around to mailing in the payment.

Other common symptoms include not living up to one’s potential, hypersensitivity to stimuli, emotional reactivity, and poor small term memory. Any one of these behaviors presents a problem for an adult. Taken as a group, they represent a potentially disabling condition.

Consider the following challenges:

1. How can the parent who procrastinates, help his ADHD child learn strategies for getting homework and other school projects finished in a timely fashion?

2. How can the disorganized parent help his child learn organizing skills to keep materials and possessions tidy and at hand?

3. How can the hyperactive, restless parent find a way to emotionally connect with a child who may prefer silent activities?

4. How can the daydreaming parent listen and be attentive to her child’s needs?

5. How can the overly emotional, small-fused parent stay cool when his child needs a steady, cool parent to help her self-regulate her own volatile unpredictable moods?

6. How does the hypersensitive parent handle the onslaught of activity and noise of a busy household? Untreated, the parent facing such challenges could easily become depressed, nervous, mad, or an explosive combination of all three, setting up a vicious cycle wrought with guilt and poor self-esteem. These parents often question why they can’t do a better job raising their child. Invariably, the child loses out too, because his or her emotional and sometimes physical needs are not being met.

Treatment for Adults

Adults with ADHD respond well to treatment. Appropriate management of adult patients with ADHD is multimodal and should include psychoeducation, counseling, supportive problem-directed therapy, behavioral intervention, coaching, and cognitive remediation. Couples or family therapy may be indicated to help the parent learn better parenting strategies for raising the ADHD child.

Stimulant medications are the first line of treatment for adults with ADHD. Stimulant use among patients with a history of substance abuse should be closely monitored to ensure that no abuse occurs. Approximately 70% of adults who have been treated with stimulant medication show a reduction of symptoms. The antidepressant medication Bupropion has also been shown to be effective in treating adults with ADHD. (Kuperman) Atomoxetine, a non-stimulant medication which is a highly selective inhibitor of the norepinephrine transporter, appears to be an efficacious treatment for adult ADHD. Its lack of abuse potential may be an advantage for many patients.

Once effective treatment is in place, adults with AHD usually do quite well. Paired with the other interventions, medication can provide the parent with the tools he or she needs to improve the quality of life for the family.

Conclusion

Because ADHD is a genetic disorder, screening the parent of the ADHD patient is imperative as part of the overall medical/psychological management of the child. Appropriate and effective treatments are available to both child and parent and should be considered for both in order for families to live successful, healthy lives.

“I just finished reading this book and I have chose that I am ADD.”

“I saw a TV show about ADHD. I have it and so does my son.”

“My daughter’s teacher says she questions too many questions. Do you reckon she’s hyperactive?”

Over the past ten years, we’ve all heard announcements like these from friends, family and even strangers.

As a spiritual coach and counselor, I deal with questions about ADD and ADHD every day. My insights may be helpful to you, too.

ADD AND ADHD IN ADULTS

Recently, a client started our counseling session by declaring that he’s ADD. His wife was quick to agree. That’s what brought them to my doorstep. They needed help with their marriage.

Often, the first step to repair a marriage starts with personal spiritual growth. Until the individual understands him- or herself, it’s hard to build trust and understanding in any relationship.

In this case, I did an energetic scan of my client. Some medical intuitives, including me, use this process to identify areas that need work. We “see” physical, emotional and energetic distress.

Next, I described to my client what I saw in the scan. I clarified it in the context of ADD. Like many people who are confused by ADD and ADHD, he was relieved to find someone who understood what was going on.

After that, I recommended that they read more about the subject. Between their studies and a few counseling session, the client and his wife were able to know each other better. According to them, it started a renaissance within their marriage.

For many adults, that’s all it takes. With a small education and some counseling, they learn how to live with ADD and ADHD.

ADD AND ADHD IN CHILDREN

Most people are diagnosed with ADD or ADHD as children. Through them, we can more about the many faces of Attention Deficit Disorder, with or without obvious hyperactivity.

Years ago, one of my most vital breakthroughs was with a 12-year-ancient client. His first statement to me was startling.

With a look of anguish, he blurted, “It hurts to be a human when I reckon of and see all that we have done to this planet. But, I know I am here to make it better.” Scanning his energy, I could sense the pain that he was in. To me, it was as if he had been born without skin. He could feel everything around him. He had no personal boundaries.

That session helped him, but it helped me even more. I learned, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that ADD and ADHD aren’t disabilities. They’re gifts. Those gifts need to be managed and nurtured, but they’re still gifts. They may even point the way that our species is evolving.

If we medicate those gifts to minimize them, we risk losing those gifts altogether.

ADD, ADHD, UNDERSTANDING AND “THE BOX”

During the following months, my practice attracted many clients with Attention Deficit Disorder and forms of hyperactivity. I was one of the few who understood them as gifts, not diseases.

My staff and I used to joke that I’d become an “ADD magnet.” But, those months were a tremendous educational experience. Some of my clients already knew about ADD and ADHD. They’d already been diagnosed. They knew the terminology and the well loved medical solutions. Some even chose the ADD mark because, finally, it defined who they were.

Those clients can be the most hard to work with. The ADD “box” acts as a protection and a defense. To help them, we must convince them to step outside that box. For someone who has lived without boundaries, that’s a very scary step. The box is the safe place to be. Convincing them to step outside can be challenging.

HOW TO HELP

The following basics can help anyone who is dealing with ADD and ADHD in children and adults.

* ADD and ADHD are gifts.
* The ADD and ADHD marks are over-used. They may mask other conditions that need to be examined.
* In addition, ADD and ADHD can be masked by other, more obvious conditions. Medication can make it even more hard to identify attention, activity and boundary issues.
* Attention Deficit Disorder, with or without hyperactivity, affect four levels: Physical, emotional, mental and spiritual. Each level must be addressed separately.
* In most cases, ADD and ADHD need to be managed, not drugged.
* In nearly all cases, these people also have heightened perceptions of — and sensitivities to — spirituality. That spirituality can provide a bridge to help them, as well as support during episodes of extreme activity and/or vulnerability.

Because these and other conditions can be “layered,” diagnosis and treatment can be hard with some clients. But, this also makes the work constantly engaging, challenging and intriguing.

THE FIRST STEP

In most cases, the first major issue is the client’s feeling of isolation. To resolve that, clients may have developed inappropriate behaviors. For example, they may be accustomed to making emergencies and drama to attract attention and support.

Until the sense of isolation is addressed, those behaviors can slow treatment. Once the client feels a stronger connection to those close to him or her, the process becomes much simpler. In addition, a client’s lifestyle needs to be reviewed. This includes diet and attitudes. Protocols must be made and understood by everyone who is connected to the client.

ADD AND ADHD AREN’T DISABILITIES

Attention Deficit Disorder is not a disability, it is a “diffability.” The person’s abilities are not “less than” or impaired, just different.

Each person is brilliant in some way. Often, this brilliance simply needs to be learned, acknowledged and unlocked. ADD and ADHD are gifts. They may represent an expansion of our awareness beyond the 10% that the brain traditionally utilizes. Let’s not try to medicate and subdue this exciting evolutionary step.

Recently, a client said to me, “I am not dumb you know, even if they all say I am.” That’s a common misunderstanding when dealing with people — especially children — who have the gift of ADD.

They’re not “dumb” or stupid. In fact, they’re so smart in such different ways, we don’t always realize that what they have is an asset.

THE FUTURE OF ADD AND ADHD

Working together, we can become smart enough to know those with ADD and ADHD. For now, let’s help these gifted people deal with isolation, dread, anxiety, depression and more. We can help each other. In this process, we may find ways to utilize even more intelligence, to help the evolutionary process. Our world could benefit greatly.

You can help people who have ADD and ADHD. Start by letting them know that they’re not alone.

By Dr. Kevin Ross Emery ]]> http://www.asumodelun.com/2009/10/05/the-gift-of-add-and-adhd/feed/ 0